Yesterday I had a major realization. And I want to share it here.
THIS is my dream life right now. The reality I’m currently living is what I manifested. It’s not something in the future to have, but it’s actually right here. I am glad, that I have a life that I’m very happy about. Of course, there are some more visions I want to implement in different parts of my life, it’s not the endgame right now. BUT: What I have right here right now is exactly where I want to be. I don’t see myself living in Toronto LONG TERM but just being here, maybe twice a year (let’s see), having some friends here, my favorite go-to places, knowing the city by heart, walking my way home, knowing which direction I have to go, this is what I manifested.
Also on top: celebrating my birthday this week here, completes it all. I’ve never had a full birthday WEEK, but this year it feels celebrating my birthday for the whole week. I arrived in Toronto yesterday (it was the earliest I have ever arrived here: 2 p.m. cause my flight was very early! Usually I arrived at about 8 p.m.), and now – on my birthday – it’s my first day here. I love spending this day here. I had the vision some months ago and now it’s reality. I will meet some of my friends later this week and I am so excited to manifest some really cool things.
I am living my vision NOW (so relieving!)
On my vision board are some major things. Some things can be turned into reality really quickly, others are a bit more “long-term” (but again: time is an illusion and actually it can all happen real quick, cause in the quantum field, it’s all a potential and already happening).
I have to admit that I already live a pretty cool life. (We can ALL be proud of ourselves here! You are doing amazing!) I work location independently (for the most part), spend a lot of time per year in Mallorca, travel a lot, I love my like-minded friends and my positive energy. I created all of this. But oftentimes I still feel restless and I’m not 100% sure about HOW I can turn my other dreams and visions into reality (and here again: the HOW is not your job when it comes to manifesting. I sometimes need to remind myself too).
When I look at my vision board (and the inner vision I tell myself), I see myself spending much time in Los Angeles, being a published author and creating uplifting & inspiring content for my YouTube community, having two (or more?) home bases with my partner – just to name a few. Many of these scenarios haven’t manifested YET in this physical world and I often see this as a “future” scenario. BUT: As I said: Time is an illusion and all we have is the present moment.
I realized now that there ARE scenarios that already BECAME true. Visions that I manifested. And being here in Toronto, Canada now, is one of them.
We don’t always have to focus on the future but really celebrate our successes in this present moment.
Yesterday evening, when walking through the streets of Toronto, I literally couldn’t stop smiling. My heart was (and still is) SO full! So much serotonin and endorphins in my body, it’s crazy!
Yesterday I really realized that being in Toronto right here, right now, is my dream life. I can really fully “bathe” in this feeling. It’s not a vision for myself in the future. I am living this right now. I manifested this. And I feel happy about it. So so happy!
THIS is my vision.
Time to take a deep breath and settle in this present moment
Yesterday I finally had a feeling of being able to “slow down”. Yes, even settling in a kind of way. There is no place I’d rather be right now. I can take a deep breath. And wow, what can I tell you – this feeling is amazing! Feeling so content, so happy and fulfilled on a deep level. I don’t know if my feelings come across the way I want to but when I had this realization yesterday, I could burst with joy! My cheeks already began hurting from so much smiling!
I am a happy person in general but the feeling & realization yesterday, was exceptional.
I had the feeling that I could tick that point off of my bucket list – while still living this vision. As I said, I don’t see myself living here forever and really settling down and living an “average” life. No, I see myself traveling to Toronto many times, having some of my friends here, going to my favorite cafés and places, knowing the city by heart.
Going down the memory lane in Toronto…
It’s now my fourth time here. My first time here was in winter 2022, so I experienced the city in its cold – and still loved it. It was a formative time and I LOVE to look back at it. The second time I was here was in September 2022 and I experienced the city in a late summer vibe. At this time, I already knew some places, even made some acquaintances and it was very special again.
My third trip here was in May this year, with one of my best friends, Carina, and I loved loved loved this time and the memories we created. We had such a blast, went to Othership (sauna & ice baths) almost every day, met friends and had our healthy food places where we went to every day.
Now, it’s my fourth time here and I feel it’s similar to some ways to winter 2022. It’s cold again (not that cold though) but this time it’s festive season and the Christmas vibes are already going on.
I am so happy and excited about what I will experience while I’m here.
Yesterday, I when I was in the supermarket, I again felt nostalgic Feb. ’22 vibes. One part of me was excited and I was indulging in memories, because first of all it was the first supermarket I’ve ever been to in Canada (and this is always something amazing haha) and second of all, I made so many memories here already (buying water, snacks, wraps, maple butter haha, the list goes on. Maybe small moments for you but big moments for me).
Life of a traveler
And then I realized again: I changed. Now, I am not sad when I leave (not thinking about this though), because I know I will be back. I always say this, but I right now I am really feeling it. Now just my mind, but also my physical body has understood it. I do not have to feel anxious. Emotionally I’m fine. I am a travel mouse (this was actually one of my favorite German songs when I was a child. They were singing “I’m a travel mouse, the world, is my home”. Translated in German, this rhymes) and there are places in this world where I always go back to. So I don’t have to be sad or feeling too nostalgic/emotional because I know I will be back at some point.
In Mallorca for example I have my favorite place for vegan pancakes and another one for delicious coffee and carrot cake. The same is true for Cologne (also speaking of coffee and carrot bread here, haha), and also Barcelona (love a spicy miso oat meal there) and Los Angeles (drinking coffee there in one of my favorite patios, in a well-known café). But does this mean, I’m not happy when I’m not there? No, not at all. Of course there are some places that I love and sometimes I think I would LOVE to be there right now. But I know that when I want to, I can come back. I cannot be at every favorite place at the same time. That is just not possible. But especially when traveling, my “radius” of the places I love to spend time, increases. I have my favorite coffee places, streets, restaurants and activities, in many places of this world (and I know the list increases over time).
Living my Canada version right now
So while I’m in Toronto right now, I’m living my “Canada version”. The “Toronto version of me. And I enjoy it so much. Going to that supermarket for example, CAN feel normal (it’s still special to go there). Doing the things I love here visiting the coffee places, walking these streets CAN feel normal. This is part of my life here. Part of the “Sabrina-in-Toronto-version.” Having this clarified for myself, feels so relieving.
I also talked with a good friend about it at some point. When we’re here, it feels we just continue living our “Toronto-version”, no matter how long the time we haven’t been here – whether it’s three months, seven months or eleven months. Maybe it’s a phenomenon, that mainly “travelers” know.
So this was it basically. I just wrote down everything that was on my heart. Without much thinking, just channeling and typing, typing, typing. I do this kind of “channeled journaling” a lot (to get a clear mind) and I thought, sharing it now is a great idea. Maybe it resonates with you in some way.
If you have read it until here: I am so happy and thankful about it. It you want to leave any comment or thought about it, feel free to do so below.
I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Wishing you a beautiful day, wherever you are in this world. Sending you much love and happiness from Toronto, Canada.
palmtrees and sunshine 