Although I think that time is just a construct in our mind, 2018 – this year – is going to end. On the one hand it feels like it’s been ages since January, on the other hand it feels like a blink of an eye. When I look back a lot has happened since the beginning of this year, especially when it comes to my mindset.
In this post I’d like to show you 18 lessons I learned in 2018.
Make sure to read to the end because I’ve got a little video for you 😉
#1 Who are good friends
Who are real friends and who are just good acquaintances? Oftentimes we label them as friends or even good friends but is this really true? Good friends really know you, they understand you, they feel what you’re trying to say. You can trust them, trust them with personal issues, they have a similar mindset and similar hobbies. You feel good in their surrounding, you have deep talks and not superficial stuff. This year it seemed as if the wind is taken out of some friendship’s sales and I’m really curious how it will develop in the next few years. However, I also experienced great moments of friendship which I am super super grateful for. We often laughed to tears and I love to think back to those moments. I’m just saying airbakken and the meme when they deleted the DB blog.
#2 The quantity of seeing a friend doesn’t determine the quality
I’ve got friends that I only see every few months or even twice a year and we get along so well. It always feels as if nothing has changed and we continue talking where we stopped the last time. So grateful for those people in my life.
#3 Summer can only be one flight away
This year one of my major dreams became true: I spent winter (or at least one week) in the sun. End of February I flew with my dad to sunny Dubai, a place I’ve always wanted to visit with him. I felt like transferred to a different world. Feeling the warmth of the sun, looking at palm trees, breathing in sticky air, walking barefoot, tanning at the beach… All this finally came true. Since then, summer became only better (I just remind you of the heat wave this year) and I guess our trip to Dubai was the first contact with summer this year. Now, I’m not longer annoyed by winter because I know it’s a choice. We have the choice to go somewhere warm. It doesn’t have to be necessarily cold in January/February. Maybe we’re just in the wrong place. Look at Brazil or Australia for example… I totally love their “winter”.
#4 There are so many people with similar mindsets out there
This year I met so many inspirational human beings, I’m thankful for everyone of them. It’s fascinating how many people are out there that are so similar to you and have a similar mindset. Sometimes we even got along after just one conversation. I really believe these are souls that have met my soul before. Thankful for this kind of connection.
#5 Veganism connects
This year I attended my first vegan meet up in Cologne. We were about 80 people. Of course it’s not possible to get to know them all in one afternoon but I was astonished how easily we all connected. I found my own little group and we somehow had all a similar mindset. From the beginning there was no time for superficial talks. Instead, we talked about our visions and goals, the universe, traveling (so many people have been to Bali), spirituality, yoga and the moon. A few weeks later I organized my own meet up where I met many other amazing people and again I realized that veganism is something that connects and brings people with the same mindset together.
#6 Stepping out of my comfort zone makes me grow
I know we all had this before and I can’t repeat 100 times but although it’s cozy in your comfort zone, it’s not a place for growth. And that’s what we all want, right? This year I stepped out of my comfort zones many times. For instance I went to several events, all alone and lo and behold: I found many like minded people and wasn’t alone at all in the end. Of course, it’s a weird feeling of going somewhere new but when your attitude is right and you know that nothing can happen to you, you feel safe and everything works out.
#7 The Law of Attraction is real
When I look back, I manifested a lot this year. Not everything became true but the majority. I realized that I have to be specific when I’m wishing, otherwise the final result will be a bit different. This happened for example in this coffee story. I also manifested a flight to Barcelona and most of all my apartment in which I lived during the summer. I will write a manifestation story about this topic too, but to summarize it: this summer I lived in the perfect apartment that fulfilled all criteria that I wrote down a few weeks earlier: centrally located from where I can walk to my university, affordable rental price, one-room-apartment and for the period of 1st June to 31st August. All this came true by visualizing and feeling it, and for being thankful that this already is my reality.
#8 Doubting and wishing out of lack won’t bring you the manifestation
Only wishing for something to happen doesn’t work out most of the time. We want things all the time but when we try to manifest from an attitude of lack, it doesn’t work out. We have to be grateful for our wishes, seeing them as already accomplished. I learned that it’s not always easy to be thankful if I don’t see it yet, but that’s the key. Bob Proctor rightly says: “If you can see it in your mind, you will hold it in your hands.” Worrying and doubting will only slow down the manifestation process.
#9 Berlin is a city I begin to like more and more
I visited Berlin three times this year. Twice because my good friend and nametwin Sabrina lived there, so I visited her. We didn’t do much touristy stuff but enjoyed our times in mostly cafés and did some stuff that locals do. Although it was -1°C and I had to wear two layers of coast and a scarf in March (!!) I only have good memories with my trips to it. In July I went there again but this time for a film project in university. We interviewed and portrayed a café in the district Prenzlauer Berg and even got our coffee for free. I have the feeling that I will visit this city in the future very often…
#10 I’m not born to work in a nine to five job
Until March this year I did an internship and again I realized that I do not fit into a nine to five job. Not at all. Although, many people try to convince me that it’s “safer” to do a normal/traditional job, I don’t share this mindset. By now, one could say that I’m really allergic to this way of working. I could (and probably will) write a whole blog post about this topic but I’m trying to be brief. To do somebody’s groundwork totally limits my creativity. I am such a creative being, always want to express my ideas and me as a person. I could create all day long, I want to be in charge of myself, work on my own project and be my own boss. All this is not possible when working for someone else. I don’t like these rules from working from nine in the morning until five in the afternoon (or longer). I don’t like this predictability in a regular job. Going out for lunch or bringing my own food which I enjoy in the office. (Don’t get me wrong, last year’s internship (2017) was amazing and I don’t want to miss this time with you all). But doing this for the rest of my life? Attending meetings and waiting for calls? Always looking forward to lunch break to go for a walk, looking forward to end of work or to the weekend? In an office I feel like a prison. I can’t unfold. I want to do something I love everyday. “Work” should not have a negative connotation. I want to be free, be my own boss, work on something that has an impact.
#11 Working for university while being on vacation is possible but not always easy
In May, me and my friend went to the wonderful Greek island Zakynthos. This time it was not a normal holiday because we also had to prepare a presentation for our oral examination. We just came back out of our internship phase and just finished a 30-pages long academic work. However we didn’t had much time to relax because there was this presentation which we had to prepare. While other students worked on it at home (and started complaining basically all the time), we decided to go on holiday and work from there. Because why not? This one week in the sun was a mixture of stress, work and relaxation but in the end, everything worked out well. We worked in the evening in our AirBnb apartment, on the beach or on our balcony while watching the sunset (or a thunderstorm haha, do you remember, Sabrina?) We even had our laptops in our hand luggage and worked from miles above the ground on the plane. It has been a special experience but to be honest, it was a bit stressful too.
#12 Chasing people doesn’t make you happy
It’s cute to have a crush but if it seems as if nothing happens, then tick it off as done. Don’t waste too many thoughts and energy to people and situations you can’t change. Some things just won’t workout and in the end you understand why all this happened (or not). Always remember that everything works out in your favor and the things that are meant for you will come to you. Just relax and release. I learned (and still learning) not to overthink and worry. Just like the sun and the moon, everyone has their time to shine. Trust that everything happens in the right timing. Don’t mentally cling to people. You might miss out the happiness of living in the moment. Remember that the best is yet to come.
#13 Sometimes it’s not worth debating with people
There are people with whom it isn’t worth debating. Discussing without getting to any point can be exhausting and a waste of time. I dealt with such a case this year and a few days ago I came to the conclusion that I just tick it off as done. Oftentimes the counterpart lives in their own reality and you can’t reach to them. They try to convince you with their mindset and want you to believe their thoughts. I respect that every one has a different belief system and it’s sometimes necessary to question your own and reality. But in the end everyone thinks what they want to think and if you don’t come to a common denominator, it’s fine too and you’re better off leaving this situation.
#14 You can’t force feelings
Earlier this year I met a guy that was totally into me but not the other way round. I realized that feelings can’t be forced – and shouldn’t be. No matter who well you get along with this person on a friendly level, never get engaged in something or making somebody false hopes. That would be unfair to both parts. Just say what you think, speak your truth and even if the counterpart doesn’t agree, you did all you could. Remember not to get involved with somebody when you don’t feel like it.
#15 Labeling is not good
There is more than black and white. When do we finally understand it? Putting people in boxed only cause frictions. I’m tired of labeling. I am vegan and I admit it but I don’t want to be labeled as this 100% vegan girl. (Yes, I still wear my old leather boots) Neither do I want do be judged. Everyone lives in their own reality, makes their own choices, their own mistakes. We are all learning. What if I ate a spoon full of honey? Could I say I’m still vegan? Is there someone who is punishing me? Although I massively care about the environment and animals, I’m not this 100% environmentalist or animal rights activist. I realized that there are so many topics I’m interested in. So many values which I stand for, so many organizations I’d like to support and projects I’d take part in. But I can’t be everywhere. Although I’d like to avoid plastic whenever I can, there are still some situations where I use a plastic bag. But does this make me a worse person? I would still call myself environmentally conscious.
Labeling also affects relationships. I don’t like this term of a “best friend” anymore. What exactly is this? Do we only need to have one? Or even one at all? What if you have several good friends? Or if your “best friend” has another best friend? For me, this labeling only causes jealousy and complicates things. Surround yourself with people that are good for you, but stop labeling.
Another topic that affected me only indirectly (friends of friends and on social media) is putting people into boxes according their sexual orientation. There is more than just black and white. You can be more than straight or homosexual. Especially nowadays, we should be more open to those kinds of topics. What about liking boys and girls but not be bi? Or being straight but loving this one girl? (Or boy?) Or being a transgender? There are no rules who you should love and which feelings you have for somebody. #loveislove
#16 A vegan diet is not boring
This point actually goes along with the point above. It’s all about labeling. When I told my family I would cook a fully vegan menu for my birthday, their reactions were sad: protests, silence, disgusted looks, sentences like “no, I’m not eating anything vegan”,…
Honestly, people, why? I can understand that this veganism topic is new to many people but it’s often made a joke of. Calling it either a phase or irrational or bullshit. People that still believe cow’s milk is healthy and eating eggs and meat have to be re-educated. It makes me more sad than angry. And also: isn’t it crazy that people say they don’t eat anything vegan? Of course, they don’t eat potatoes, tomatoes, other veggies or eat fruits. They probably never eat an apple or drink tea… Don’t make me laugh! But I guess it’s just this antipathy for this lifestyle… because they’re uneducated. We, vegans, eat more than carrots and tofu. Vegan food is nutrient and colorful – not for nothing it’s called “eat the rainbow”. I attended three wonderful vegan gatherings and our food was amaaazing! Oh how do I miss those buffets 😉 But coming back to my birthday: I cooked a delicious four courses menu (including caramelized eggplant, pumpkin-coconut soup and a raw vegan avocado lime pie) and in the end everyone was full and content. I guess sometimes all they have to do is try it and not knowing that it’s branded as “vegan”.
#17 The prophecies of my fortune teller became true
This year I visited a fortune teller for the first time and I was amazed and baffled of how much she already knew about me. Some skeptics may say this is hocus-pocus but I definitely believe in what she said. She not only told me my characteristics (which was put in a nutshell) but also told me some events of my future (which have partly proven true). She gave tips on how to behave in certain situations but in the end it’s ourselves who still decide our destiny. We are the captain of our own ship and have the final say. To give you some examples, she said that I will move (which I did in summer), that traveling is something that calms down my mind or that I’ll get a side job that is not study-related. Some things haven’t happened yet but I think it’s because my subconscious mind still believed it’s not gonna happen. I trusted the fortune teller and relied on her prophecies but if we’re not aligned and ready for this to happen, we block it and her prophecies can occur delayed. By now I truly understood it (at least hoping so) and I’m doing my inner work to put myself in the receiving mode.The other things she said are too personal to share online but I’m really blown away by her talent to see what’s going on in my mind. Many of many family members and their friends went there as well and were also stunned and amazed by her gift. Have you made any experiences with a fortune teller so far?
#18 Don’t rashly judge a person
When you don’t know their story, don’t judge them. Even when you only know one side of the story. I met a girl online and always thought she’s a nice person but suddenly things turned around and I had a really bad image of her. And even a close friend of one of her friends told me what a wrong person she indeed is. I could totally understand his thoughts and believed him because it seemed so obvious to me. I kinda had the same feeling before and he only gave me approval. But after a time I realized that this was only his side of the story and I actually don’t know what truly happened. So from now on I try to be unbiased and make my own opinion.
But not only in personal matters it’s important to not judge a person right away. After I watched A Star is Born in October, I have become a great Lady Gaga fan (Paws up, Little Monsters). Before watching this movie I have never been a fan of her. Actually, she was never an issue in my life. She only got my attention when she was in the press, probably again showing one of her crazy outfits. To be honest, that’s all I connected with her: Her crazy costumes, her meat dress, her shrill red carpet appearances. After A Star is Born I began to google her more often because I was so impressed by her performance as an actress. I watched interviews, little clips and her documentary “Five Foot Two”. This documentary – which I can truly recommend you – was the best proof that I was deluded. Most people that don’t like her either probably have a totally wrong image of her. This movie showed me that she’s more than just her outfits. She is an artist (artistic in so many ways), so talented (look at her raw voice and the amount of instruments she plays), so kind, so warm-hearted and loving. She’s such a family person, always caring for loved ones, her friends and her fans. I’ve barely seen any other celebrity caring so much for her fans, like she does. Moreover she’s such an emotional and grateful person, not the seemingly harsh pop star. You see I could really write a whole blog post about Lady Gaga. I’m listening and singing to her songs everyday (they’re so much deeper than you think at first glance). I’m kinda obsessed with her right now #sorrynotsorry. Maybe you’re becoming a fan, too? (Or are you already one? Answer me below)
So these were the 18 lessons I have learned in 2018. The more I write, the more I can think of but I guess those are enough.
I am truly interested in your thoughts, if you can relate to some points and what you have learned this year? I would be so happy if you could share yours in the comments below so we can have a little chat.
See you next year,
If you want to see what I’ve experienced in a visual form, then you can check out my YouTube video: